Women Element Table

A new element has been discovered and placed on the

Element : Woman
Symbol : Wo
Discoverer : Adam Edenwarden
Atomic mass: Accepted as 53.6 kg; isotopes vary from 35 - 200 kg.
Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

Surface usually covered with thin painted film
Boils at room Temperature
Freezes without any known reason

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

Have great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones
and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances

May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason
Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increases by saturation
in alcohol

Most powerful money reducing agent known to man


COMMON USES:

Highly ornamental, especially in bikes and cars
Can be a great aid to relaxation
Very effective cleaning agent

TESTS:

Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy
Turns green when placed beside a better specimen

AVAILABLITY:

Available in wide different forms and varieties
Can be easily seen in all busy areas

POTENTIAL HAZARDS:

Highly dangerous except in experienced hands Illegal to posses more than one,
although several can be maintained at different locations as long as
specimens do not come into direct contact with each other